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Friday, March 25, 2011

Why a blog?

So,let me start out by saying that I never thought in a million years I'd have a blog.I don't know how great I'll be at it, but my sweet daughter(thank you Linds) helped me set this up, so here it goes.

I would first like to try to put into words the absolute gratitude I feel toward all of you that have given me support through this crazy time. The love and concern you have shown has been overwhelming. I am surrounded by an amazing group of people and every one of you has filled my heart to the bursting point. I am one lucky girl, in fact, just writing this has me choked up. I love you all dearly.

So hopefully this will help everyone keep up to date on what's going on......and I'll start from the beginning.

I started having abdominal pain last summer, uncomfortable, but manageable. I went in for my yearly check-up in October and mentioned it to my doctor. She ordered an ultra-sound and there was some bleeding present but they couldn't tell where it originated from. My doctor(Dr Shorter) referred me to a gynecologist(Dr Holmes) for a more extensive exam. Because of the tenderness in my lower abdominal region, she ordered another ultra-sound. From US#1 to US#2 there seemed to be improvement in the bleeding, so I was given a choice of surgery to go in and look around or just see if it would heal itself. Of course I wanted to avoid surgery, so I waited a couple more months. The pain continued. We scheduled surgery and Dr Holmes performed a laparoscopy on March 1st. One small incision in my belly button, one on each side. She told me often times she'll go in and not see anything going on. Well, that was NOT the case when it came to me! Pretty freaking huge cyst came out of Cortney's stomach! It's been compared to a small dinner plate and was full of one liter of blood. It had burst and bled into itself, spreading until it was laying on most of my organs. Dr Holmes talked to Rick after surgery and explained she totally understood why I was in so much pain. It came off clean, so that's that right?

My recovery was easy, felt awesome actually, no more pain, life is sweet! Dr Holmes called me the following Tuesday. The pathology came back and it was a very rare form of ovarian cancer.(it's called a Mesodermal adenosarcoma, please don't look it up, it will freak you out). It's rare because there have only been like 40 cases in the last 30 years. I found out that rare doesn't necessarily mean good or bad though so we are cool. I was in shock, not what I expected to hear. My doctor was in shock, she expected endometriosis. She referred me to Dr Dodson, my oncologist. I was a mess, had to call Rick while he was driving(he'd gone to pick up Tay from Tucson). My mom and Linds rushed over to sit with me until he got there. It was a rough 24 hours.

So, I pretty much had nowhere to turn and no information. I called the oncologists office and didn't have an appointment until the following Tuesday. I can't explain the anxiety that I was filled with. And this is where I have to make mention of my sister Megan, my guardian angel. I don't know what I'd do without her. She has a client who pulled some strings and got me in the next day. What a relief, I will owe her forever, I love her so much. The appointment with Dr Dodson went so great. He was thorough and brutally honest which was really scary but helpful at the same time. I'll never forget what he said as Rick and I left " now go home and have a good cry, and let's work on getting you better", I appreciated him for that.

Since that second, I've had moments of panic, but overall, I'm pretty much going to kick this things ass! Life as usual, and just trying to live normal. I work, I hang out with the dog and the fam, I clean, that's my life in a nutshell! And I have a wonderful life! I'm trying to look at this as simply an " interruption" in my perfect world.

Part of my perfect world has this guy Rick in it.....who is perfect. He doesn't know it , but he kept me from crumbling. My sweet supportive husband. I will say it again, I'm one lucky girl! I can't imagine being on his side of it, riddled with worry, but what a rock he is. " let's not worry until we have to" he says, and he's right. Scary thoughts creep in and we shove them out, he has helped me so much stay positive. I adore him and am so thankful I have him. My whole family has been amazing!

My birthday was the 21st, I was taken to breakfast, and enjoyed dinner made by chef Lindsey, tons of gluten-free cupcakes were present that I enjoyed and everyone else choked down. I went to Bon Jovi the following night with mom and Meg, hilarious! Wednesday was filled with the coolest surprise party, thrown by my sweet staff at the restaurant! Good times!

That brings us to Thursday, I needed a CT scan of my chest to determine if anything had spread to my lungs. Here comes the anxiety again. The scan is easy, painless and uneventful, it's the results we were waiting on pins and needles for. Friday morning came and the doctor called and said it was clear, what a huge relief! That pretty much brings us up to date, my surgery is scheduled for Apr 20. I will receive a full hysterectomy and 6 rounds of chemotherapy minimum.

Between now and then, we are coasting! I'm going to go enjoy me some Redlands, watching my daughter race her cool bike and flash my blue painted fingernails to wish her luck!